dear diary pt.2

Lately everything’s been going to shit. My relationships with my friends. My skin. My grades. My mental health just everything. Nothing seems to help me get through and mend this rough patch. Maybe that’s just how life will be without you. 

Yes I know. I shouldn’t be thinking about you. I shouldn’t be dwelling on all that we had. But that’s me I over analyze, over think and feel too much. You were once my source of happiness. My everything and now you are the cause of my pain and depression.

I never thought that I would experience pain as bad as when Waldo passed. But for some reason, the pain you caused is worse. 

They say love makes you blind. But for me you made me see reality clearer. You helped me – you healed my broken soul. You were the one thing I didn’t know I needed in my life. Once you entered everything changed. I was happier. I became more comfortable with who I was. I was the best version of my self. 

But without you now, it hurts so fucking much. I’m not me. I’m like a lost dog, wandering aimlessly trying to find my best friend. 

-XOXO chana

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